The Lover by Marguerite Duras - Pedophilia Alert

 The Lover by Marguerite Duras was  such an interesting read! I think that a common element that we have read so far is about men who are horrible and dumb. And now we have a man who is interested in pedophilia. The Lover is about the relationship between a 15-year-old schoolgirl and her older romantic interest who approaches her in a limousine. Honestly, their age gap made me feel weird about their relationship at first. He would pick her up from school in the limousine and bring her back to his apartment. However, as I kept reading the story, it made me think about the power dynamic between the two. Usually, it would seem predator-like since he is preying on a 15-year old girl and he has the leverage in the relationship. However, their relationship is far from normal. This is because the girl believes that she has the leverage over the older man and thinks that he is “weak.” That made her believe that she wasn’t being exploited and this could be seen as her way of justifying their relationship imbalance. The quote, “He’s twelve years older than I, and this scares him” (40) reiterates this notion where she isn’t thinking clearly and thinks that she has the upper hand in their relationship. Honestly, this is crazy to think about because there are some girls out there in the world who have this mentality. This shows how clearly manipulated they were. I think this feeling could stem from wanting to be seen, wanted, and loved by people drawn into romantic relationships in the first place. People want to feel fulfilled. However, it is important to note that there is a reason why it’s illegal to date minors and pursue romantic relationships with them. There has to be a balanced dynamic in terms of age for two people to be in a romantic relationship. On the other hand, I think it’s important that the girl is in the journey of her adolescence where she thinks she knows everything and has power over everything. This makes her think that she has control in their relationship. This is further fueled by her white background. However, she is from a poor socioeconomic standing and he is from a rich background, so perhaps that could play into how she thinks that he is enticing for a romantic interest.  My question is how do you think her life would play out if she wasn’t romantically involved with him?

Comments

  1. Daniel OrizagaMarch 9, 2026 at 12:17 AM

    To briefly answer your question, though without addressing it fully, we can speculate, based on what we've already read, about why the narrator believes it's important to read this story, or rather, to remember it and retell it so many years later. Why go to such lengths to revisit that past?

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  2. Jon Beasley-MurrayMarch 10, 2026 at 11:01 AM

    I think that to call the lover here a pedophile is to bring too much clarity to a situation that for Duras is always murky and uncertain... At fifteen and a half (and the "half" both suggests that she is older, but also that she's younger, because only children add that "and a half" to their ages), she isn't exactly a child, even if she isn't exactly an adult. NB the age of consent in Canada and many other places is 16, and in Canada it was 14 until surprisingly recently... so the narrator here is *almost* there, again if not quite... The book explores this ambiguity, alongside the other ambiguities of power (race, wealth, etc.) that structure this odd relationship.

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